The world was waking up; the birds were calling out to one another, sharing cheery conversations. The grass, giving out the wonderful scent, filled the place with the smell of spring, a fresh new smell, the smell of a new start.
But as cheerful as the day may seem; she knew deep down that these were all just a veneer beneath the pain that was to come, beneath the end that was inevitable. And thinking about it broke her heart, it broke her soul.
Today was her last; she was eager to jump on every opportunity to savour this day. It may not necessarily be her last that was what the doctor said, but deep down she knew that her time was up and she tried her best to seize each day with its every little detail no matter how insignificant they might seem. She held on to every ounce of her failing strength with a ferocity that was both frightening and amazing to witness.
She had used to take every day for granted; she used to take the serenity around her for granted. She had thought that the birds would always be there when she awoke, that she would see the sun as she opened her eyes. But now all had changed, she wasn't even sure if she could wake up at all.
Her mother used to whisper in her ear, bending down to kiss her forehead as she lay in her bed, telling her gently, "Seize the day, my child. For you will never know what might come in your way in the future." She still remembered it so clearly, the soft skin of her mother, the gentle warmth in her eyes and the farmiliar loving touch of her mother.
She did not use to live her life to the fullest, to live each day to its best. But now, as she faced with what was to come, she finally understood, without a doubt, what her mothe rmeant to seize each and every day as it came.
The cancer was eating away at her, slowly and painfully. Though somehow, the heartache that she felt was more overwhelming than the physical pain she was feeling. For during this period of time where she needed her love the most, he chose to left her. Yes, he left her.
She heard those heartbreaking words left her lover's lips. His lips that once used to kiss and heal all her wounds, now hurting her so badly. She did not know what was the reason but he said he wanted to be with God more than he wanted to be with her. It cut her real deep.
To her, it was like a rude slap to her cheek. It stung her real deep and it felt like her whole world was crumbling, leaving her alone to pick up the debris, the pieces of the huge mess. And there was nothing she could do but to live on her remaining days like her mother told her to.
"Carpe Diem". She thought she heard her mother's sweet voice again. But she knew it was impossible as her mother has been watching over her for the pass few days from above.
She looked out to the sky. The sun was rising steadily, the trees swaying and the waves crashing upon the shore. She could feel her strength draining. And the deep dark abyss seem to call for her. But amidst all this, all she could think of was her love. She wanted one last touch, one last kiss but she knew she would never have it.
"I tried my very best to seize each and every day mama. And i know you will be proud of me. But i failed to keep my love." At that moment, rivulets of tears glistened her cheeks, blurring her vision. She could feel the dark abyss pulling her away.
Her thoughts drifted away and her heartbeat slowed down for the first time in so many months, bringing a calm that was so reassuring.
As her vision dimmed, she thought she saw his face. She could smell the unmistakable smell of his cologne, mixed with the smell of spring, the smell of a new beginning.
By and by as she fell into the dark abyss, she thought she heard him say, "I never should have left you darling.. I love y-"
-Carpe Diem-
We should appreciate every little thing we have. The people around us, gifts, blessings, curse, opportunities and chances. Not all people in the world are as fortunate as we are. We can be so broke and holed in our pockets but there are people who are broke, holed and still having loans to pay. Appreciate what we all have and live life to the fullest. Its not as bad as it looks. Appreciate chances. They dont come by easily.
Imagine if everyone could at least appreciate 1 extra thing in their life everyday. For example, for once maybe, just sit quietly and do some deep thinking. "Thank God that i've got such a luxurious meal for lunch today". As simple as that. Appreciating is important. If a person is able to appreciate things more, he/she will regret over lesser things in the future.
Learn to appreciate, Appreciate to learn.
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